Reliving the past...Part II

I remember it coming close to Christmas day and I wanted to go home. Christmas Eve I had a big breakdown, I yelled and cried at an idiotic Dr and a lovely midwife because I wanted to go home. I'd been in that hospital for 3 weeks and I was completely jack of it. Everyone else was busy making plans on how they'd celebrate and the hospital refused me a day pass to even go home for a few hours, even my room-mate was allowed to go home and drink champagne. Ian visited first thing in the morning with presents (He's shocking at picking presents, he brought me a giant teddy bear and "Guess Who" which would have been great presents if I were 6 years old). My Nan, Aunt, Uncle & cousins visited for about 15 minutes then everyone left. It wasn't even lunch time yet. That day was really, really sad. All the midwives I was accustomed to seeing were rostered off and the ward was full of temps. I was alone in my room with shitful Xmas day tv, and all I could hear outside were visitors for the other patients and crying babies.

So there were lots of APH's happening left right and centre. I can't remember exactly when and how far apart they were anymore. I'd seen a few different OB's while I was in that hospital, the one I was assigned to, said that they'd aim for 36-37wks before delivering, another OB, Jennifer, said that I'd have to make it to 38 weeks, and another Raymound, said there is no reason that I couldn't make it to 40 weeks! Although Jennifer told me all the OBs were on holidays and there wouldn't be any elective c-sections until around the 10th of January. Holy hell. Luckily, I guess, with the frequency of bleeding that I had, they decided after Christmas that I would be delivered with my "next significant bleed". This was sited on my notes.

New Years Eve. There was the most hideous midwife working this shift, along with one totally brilliant one. Room-mate and I were asleep by about 9.30pm, nothing much to celebrate when you're stuck in hospital while everyone else is off partying. Ian called at Midnight. Hideous midwife had champagne and waltzed into our room with the bottle saying things like "what a shame you can't have any". Bitch. I remember a patient in another room had an emergency and you could hear the brilliant midwife calling the hideous one, who was just leisurely walking the hallways, not to be hurried. The brilliant midwife was screaming at her to hurry and had pressed the alarm button for the OB to attend. I bled around 3am. I remember laying in bed terrified to press the nurses buzzer because I wasn't at all ready for an emergency c-section, nor was I ready to deal with an idiotic midwife, but after a few minutes I buzzed.

She came into my room and said, "Yes, what is it this time". "I'm bleeding", I say as I wait for her to page the OB to get me ready with canulas, strap me to the CTG and prep me for surgery - the canulas and CTG monitoring are procedure during an episode of bleeding. Instead, she didn't call for a Dr, nor did she put me on the CTG, instead she retreived a doppler from her pocket, put it on my tummy for 20 seconds and said, "The baby is fine" and left. I should add, the doppler was hers from home and not approved for her to use on the ward. I was left alone until 8am when I had my next round of observations.

One Dr, "Raymond" would see me every few days when he did rounds, and in an utterly bizarre run of coincidences, every time he visited me, I would haemorrhage within 12 hours, despite him not laying a finger on me. He was the Dr to visit me on New Years Day. He joked that seeing as though I always bled after seeing him, he was tempted not to visit me that morning, but said it was all okay because if I was to bleed I'd be delivered anyway. So, I said to him, "I bled last night" and he looked as though I'd hit him in the head with a hammer, there was NOTHING written in my notes about my bleeding. I should have been delivered. He was furious and stormed out of the room to see what had happened.

I didn't hear anymore of it though, but dreaded that woman being on shift in the future. (I still think to this day I should write to the NUM and report it, fat lot of good it would do, but it may help me personally).

I was visited during the week by my OB who said that I'd been put on the theatre list for Friday, 7.1.06, I was first on the list, so if there were no emergencies, I'd be going in at 1pm. Scary and exciting all at once to know that I would be a Mum on Friday. I rang Ian to tell him, told Mum and Nan. Repeated my wishes for absolutely no visitors that day, it was to be our family time, no if's or but's.